The elusive formula, Bollywood's equivalent of the philosopher's stone, has been
searched ever since the inception of Bollywood. Rajan Johri tries his hand, and
look at what he's got!
Rajan Johri's Formula: Take a big movie that is going to be released (Company, in this case), take all relevant factors and multiply them with a constant between 1 and 18 (patience! explanation follows), hire actors that the public recognizes (for whatever reasons), shoot the movie ASAP, release it alongside the aforementioned 'big movie'. Voila, what do we have!
Ansh has six dons (Company has three), seven songs (as opposed to Company's two), and thirty-six ministers and VIPs assassinated (a paltry two ministers tapko-fied in Company). Some formula application this!
Abbas (Rajnath Guru), grandson of a freedom fighter (Alok Nath), comes to Mumbai for a job, fails to find one, and is implicated in a case of extortion and beaten up. Sigh. A don is born. Rajnath becomes Guru Bhai and joins the stables of Dau (Ashutosh Rana), where he also meets Munna Bhai (Rajat Bedi). So far there are three.
In the opposite camp we have Govind Eda (Sayaji Shinde) and Babu Bhai (Milind Gunaji) who join hands as result of a political alliance between the ministers they work for. That adds up to, let me see now... hmm, five. One more needed for the execution of the mysterious formula. So Sukhbir Singh (Ashutosh Rana), an SI implicated in a fabricated case and consequently suspended, joins the ranks as a 'bhai' to cleanse the dirt from within. The DCP, Bhagat Pande (Om Puri) decides to help his chela, and doffs his uniform and goes out in a banian, shooting bad guys (agar tum Rupa ki baniyan pahnoge to aisa hi hoga!)
Now to kill 36 politicians and other VIPs. The director has managed an arbitrary number below ten so far and finds time running out. So he sends Abbas to pep talk his freedom fighter grandpa, and Alok Nath picks up a rifle, walks into the Parliament and shoots enough of them to reach the magic number. Shows to what depths people stoop to adhere to 'the formula'.
The director manages to fit in four 'item' songs and one 'tapori' song. Still two short of his intended goal, he introduces Sanjana (Sharbani Mukherjee) who seems to be on a proving spree. First she proves she can't sing for nuts, now she descends to acting. Quota filled as Guru and Sanjana sing a couple of duets.
The movie ends with the bad dons being shot and the good dons being hung.
Let's not talk about the technicalities in deference to the tight deadline the director was following. The fact that Sharbani Mukherjee disappears without any trace after the second song she is in should tell you enough about the editing. Nadeem-Shravan haven't bothered much and it shows. The actors ham so badly, it cooks your bacon. And the director is too busy multiplying and adding to pay attention to where the movie is going.
With such strict formula application, Ansh is gonna give Company a run for it's money. Hyuk hyuk! Lol! Haw haw haw...
Note: The writer is at times delirious due to exposure to occupational hazards.