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Timepass Review

Smriti Kashyap /
Can watch again
Good for kids
Good for dates
Wait to rent it
If you take some rat poison and mix it in water with a pinch of arsenic thrown it, you don't get something even a quarter as lethal. Hanging upside down with a shark's mouth just half an inch away from your head is much more entertaining. 'Timepass' is a regular C-grade movie, and seems happy just to be that. It doesn't want to pull any stunts to prove it otherwise.

The whole story is stuff that has been thrashed out by the seedy and not-so-seedy filmmakers. Badri, Baachi, Raju and another guy are four bachelors who are roommates. The opening shot establishes firmly that Raju is a spineless nice guy who gets bullied incessantly by his other roommates.

Dramatis personae: Raju is a bank manager - State Bank Of Hyderabad, in case you are the curious sorts. The other guys are a peon, a chaiwallah and a panwallah, in that order. For comic relief in this 'trying to be comic' film, we have a blind beggar along with his two sidekicks, a dumb guy and a handicapped guy. We also those chaiwallah etc.'s girlfriends. So at any given time, there is a minimum of three character artistes screaming out their dialogues just to make sure you understand them.

The rest of the movie has you see Raju having a major love dhoka, in the form of his 'maradalu pilla' getting married to another guy. So to avoid the ragging of his roomies, he makes up a fictitious girlfriend in Delhi and writes himself love letters. So when the guys actually find themselves in a fix over their girls, they all decide to elope to Delhi to take shelter in the fictitious girlfriend's home.

What happens after that is the post-interval session of the movie where you see the first pretty girl on screen and realize why we lap up all those movies with pretty faces. What also happens is major chaos, which you might not be interested in unless you are pathologically suicidal.

That's Timepass' basic skeletal story for you. This movie sucks from the first frame itself. It does have its bright moments though, which has you giggling involuntarily. For example, the gf of one of the guys sits by the pool in her swimsuit and takes a mug and pours water over herself.

The hero of the film, Raju (Ajay), looks suspiciously like my neighbor's husband, which isn't a good sign. He can't act for nuts and has makeup all over his mustache. The peon guy is in Adidas T-shirts all through the movie. How much does a peon earn anyway? Going by the way the guy dresses, I would think he was an income tax payer. The movie reeks of idiocy, and to add to the I-quotient, we have that Ali guy trying to act funny.

This film is as exciting as watching paint dry. It does have a storyline, but that is the most painful part. If you think that maybe you can murder a few hours sitting in the hall, then you better bring a tiffin carrier along because the snacks at the hall are as rubbery as my Hawaii chappals.

Well, happy jumping off the cliff!
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