Seventh Son (Hindi) Review

So there was a not-so-successful book written by a not-so-successful author. We wonder what potential the studio saw in this book that they decided to make a movie out of it. Not any movie, but a movie with A-listers like Jeff Bridges and Julianne Moore in it. And then splurge more money to make it a 3D affair.

That pretty much describes Seventh Son, a film that released a full year after the intended date as the company behind it went bankrupt and then tied up with a different studio to finally ship this one out. And once you watch the movie you'll realize why it had to go through so much trouble.

The film's script is as clichéd as clichés come. It begins with a knight imprisoning a mysterious creature in a tunnel and riding away. A few decades later, the mysterious creature breaks free from the tunnel in the form of a dragon. The dragon then turns into a witch named Mother Malkin (!!!@@&&&) played by Julianne Moore. And the knight who'd imprisoned her ages into Master Gregory (Jeff Bridges) in one of his usual silver-haired and bearded avatars.

Master Gregory takes on apprentices who are the seventh sons of seventh sons. After his current apprentice is killed by Mother Malkin, he seeks out a new one, Thomas Ward (Ben Barnes). Thomas and Master Gregory set out to kill Mother Malkin and her army of dark forces.

To this utterly formulaic construct where you realize that the previous apprentice is destined to die and that the current apprentice is the chosen one, there is another cliché added in the form of a love story with zero romance. The love interest of Thomas Ward also happens to be the daughter of the sister of Mother Malkin.

The movie has no thrills or chills. The dialogues are one-note, with not one that will evoke so much as a chuckle. The path to killing the witch and her army is not laden with any danger, and you are never in doubt that the mission will succeed. There are no twists and the screenplay runs ramrod straight.

The performances are all fine - not that you would expect anything less from a movie with actors like in this one. The technical values are decent but the 3D seems largely unnecessary (the best 3D effects in the theatre played out during the Minions trailer).

Seventh Son promises a sequel in the end, but that appears a pipe dream given the lukewarm reception the film has received across the world. The theatre we watched it in was around a quarter full on a Saturday, and most of the audience appeared to have landed up only enticed by the fact that this was a 3D movie. Spare yourself the expense.